Lately, I have had such a peace. I can feel the love of the Lord. There are so many things to do and worry about, but I just have a calm attitude for them. A few days back I had one of my "philosophical meltdowns." I am one who thinks about, worries about, tries to solve, and gets consumed by the problems of the world. I just want to do something but am lost about what to do. I get tired of these moments, and have lately been troubled by what I need to do as a Christian. I know that this world is sinful, and I also know that as a follower of Christ I am not to follow the world, to not be a part of it. I have been wondering if I need to care so much, if I should just let the world destroy itself and look forward to Heaven. I finally reached out to a mentor as to what I should do and got great comfort from the answer. To reaffirm the answer, the entry for today in My Utmost for His Highest talked specifically about getting consumed by the world's problems. We must always turn to Jesus and His peace.
My mentor and Chambers gave me the entire picture. When we are consumed by worry, fear, and hopelessness, we must turn to Jesus; we must run to our Father. We must cry in His arms and let Him comfort us. When we are getting bogged down by the troubles of the world, we are actually being stubborn and even prideful. When I am going through those feelings and thoughts, I am actually believing that I can actually do something all by myself. I think that I am strong enough, smart enough, powerful enough to set the world right. Again, I am like a person crawling lost in the desert. I desperately need some water, and Jesus offers cool, refreshing, uplifting water, but I am determined to get to the water that I see in the mirage before me. What I see could be a mirage or it could even be real, but the point is that I am refusing even better water that Jesus is offering and bringing to my exhausted self. Let go, give up, we can't make it to the mirage. Take the water of Jesus, let Him comfort and take care of you.
The moment His water of peace touches your lips, everything changes. The problems of the world are still there, but instead of looking up at them from your hands and knees, you can now stand with His strength and look at it from a different angle. You don't need to detach yourself from the world as I was thinking; you don't need to be consumed with the breaking worry of solving the problems, though. He fills you with peace, love, and joy. You are lifted up with the joy of life. Maybe I can make a difference and alleviate the world of some problem, but that is not what my life is for. He gave me life to enjoy the beauty that He created around me and to love Him. I am filled with such an uplifting compassion for His creation. I see others who are troubled and want to dance around them until they join me in admiring God's awesomeness.
Don't be afraid to show this joy. Britt Nicole has a great song called "The Lost Get Found" saying exactly that: don't hold back, God's love and joy from your audience. And who is your audience? You never know.
Two days ago, I almost got hit by a huge red truck in the Walmart parking lot. I was parked two slots down from the cart cage, and the slot between the cart cage and my car was empty. Well, I put my cart up and turned to go to my car when some one behind me suddenly shouts, "look out!" I look up and step back just in time for this truck to pull into the empty spot I was just about to cross. I was literally a foot away from being hit by this truck swinging into the spot. I look back at the guy who had warned me, a little shock by what had just happened. "Girl! He almost hit you!" the man exclaimed. I just give a shocked laugh and reply, "yeah, that was close." I quickly walk around the truck, get into my car, and thanked God for saving me. I wasn't filled with anger toward this driver, though. I wasn't hidden by anything, so I was a little peeved that he hadn't watched for me or waited for me to cross the spot, but I wasn't angry. We were both at fault: I wasn't paying attention, and the driver was on his cell phone coming from behind me. We both should have been more attentive to our surroundings.
I turned my car on and was about to leave when he opens his door and steps out, still on the phone. When those around me are outside of their cars, I will wait until they are in the cars or out of the way, just in case. Well, the thought ran through my head to just go ahead and back up, maybe my side mirror will get close to him and spook him like he had done to me. I waited though. I was safe, so no more action needed to be related to the event, and I didn't think that God would condone such a responce. Waiting was a very good decision. He opens his back door, and twin six-year-old boys hop out. What if I had banged on this guy's car, cussed at him, and made a scene? What kind of example would I have beento him and those boys? if I had suddenly backed up, what if those boys had jumped out right behind me? What about the guy who had shouted at me; what kind of example to him would I have been? I could have talked about what a jerk the driver was; the guy who shouted was probably expecting it. I'm not saying that I am a saint in this situation; ha, I was more shocked than anything else. God gave me His protection and His joy, and he also reminded me that we never know who is watching.
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